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30 Jan

He reported this to the police, and the next day she sent his photo to several people, including my mother and his boss. I know he is a victim here, and I want to support him, but a part of me is livid that he got involved in an intimate chat with a strange woman online.

Have an honest conversation with your superiors about what you’ve been doing, and how you can no longer continue at this pace.

You’re not asking them to fire him—you’re giving them an honest assessment of the current situation, so that they can make an informed decision about what to do next.

If the time comes to let him go, it will be better for him in the long run to find a job he’s capable of doing, rather than hoping one of his colleagues will carry him upon their shoulders indefinitely.

Surely you don’t think you can cover up his mistakes for the rest of your life.

I have given him highlighted hard copies with notes and tracked changes versions of his documents with explanations of why we do things one way instead of his way.I employ the sandwich method (a nice comment—constructive criticism—a nice “thanks for your work! I have made myself available for assistance and questions.I am worried that if I tell our bosses the extent of his failures, he will get fired.But deep down, I want and need him to get fired, because he has shown himself incapable of improving.There’s nothing wrong with finding a different living situation for them if your own health is suffering. Each time he submits his work, it takes several hours—sometimes an entire day—to fix it.You’ve done your best to make reasonable accommodations, and nothing’s worked; you don’t have to spend the next 10 years gasping for breath and blinking back tears just because you think you’re under a lifelong obligation to your girlfriend’s pets. This has been going on for a year now, and I have tried numerous times to help him.

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